The hope of something new

There are times when things seem to be meant to be or more than a coincidence. There are some people that you meet that just seem like they were supposed to be in your life all along.

I have finally identified what I enjoy most about the first few interactions with a new potential romantic relationship.

 

How great does it feel that someone sees you and decides that they want you in their life....if only for a short time.

How wonderful is it to have someone actually listen to the story of your life for the first time and want to know more.

It feels even better for that person to then comment that you are a "cool person".

At times you can take the people in your life for granted because it has typically been many moons since they initially decided "Hey I want you to stick around in my life indefinitely". You take for granted that every day/ every interaction they decide that yes they want to keep on knowing you.

 

I am in awe of the fact that every day a select few people on this earth make the decision to actively foster a relationship with me simply because I am worth of their love and attention.

 

 

 

Easter forgiveness

I am a total believer in signs and that all things happen for a reason. During the Easter holiday I ran into an old friend of mine twice. I still had negative feelings about this friend due to things that she had done that affected me negatively in the past. I made a lot of decisions based on her opinion and valued her input highly. During high school she and my other best friend completely stopped talking to me and did not do so again until close to our graduation.
I always wondered what I had done to them and how I could get back in their good graces. I thought it was because I did not experiment with some of the things they had, was too boring or something along those lines. I found out after graduation that one of my best friends had actually been the one to do something against me.
I then transitioned from sad to mad. Over the years we would exchange pleasantries if we ran into each other, but I always heard derogatory terms when thinking of her. I finally realized this year that I have to forgive her. Not for her, because I don't think there is some sort of forgiveness sensor that she will pick up on. Because it is better for me. I hold on to things for a long time because I spend too much time thinking about how others feel. I don't really understand impulsive people as so many of my actions have come after careful deliberation. As this happened during Easter I thought W.W.J.D and for course the simple answer is forgive. He has already forgiven her, why am I still judging her for something she did as an adolescent I am sure it was hard on her too and that is why she couldn't face me. If she had been shameless we would still be friends until I found out what happened.
Forgiveness the gift that keeps on giving:)

I have developed a philosophy to limit the negativity in my life. Most recently this led me to the decision to "unfriend" a co-worker both in the virtual and real world. I struggle with this because I am a mate-for-lifer.
I had always found her communication and friendship style a little lacking. There were put-downs, Facebook stalking of a guy that I was dating and constant questioning about my love life. I also felt that there was some jealousy on her part. I did a lot of work to try to build her self-esteem by encouraging her, but it didn't seem to take. Everything came to a head when she discussed how hot a guy that I previously dated was and then stated that she would be intimate with him, did I mention this was in a car full of my co-workers including my boss.
I am a very private person and would like only my best friends to know what is going on in my personal life and then for them not to discuss it in public. I was dumbfounded by this turn of events. There was yelling and then she ended by telling me that I needed to unfriend a hot guy that we both know that she has a crush on. For a second I thought I was back in middle school were a crush meant ownership.
I had a run in with her and when I froze when she greeted me expletives could be heard from her. This is the exact thing I need less of. It also reiterated that she doesn't know me as I don't handle conflict well and do all I can to avoid it. But now that one awkward moment is out of the way I can go about my positive life with one less negative weight on my shoulders.