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Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Easter forgiveness

I am a total believer in signs and that all things happen for a reason. During the Easter holiday I ran into an old friend of mine twice. I still had negative feelings about this friend due to things that she had done that affected me negatively in the past. I made a lot of decisions based on her opinion and valued her input highly. During high school she and my other best friend completely stopped talking to me and did not do so again until close to our graduation.
I always wondered what I had done to them and how I could get back in their good graces. I thought it was because I did not experiment with some of the things they had, was too boring or something along those lines. I found out after graduation that one of my best friends had actually been the one to do something against me.
I then transitioned from sad to mad. Over the years we would exchange pleasantries if we ran into each other, but I always heard derogatory terms when thinking of her. I finally realized this year that I have to forgive her. Not for her, because I don't think there is some sort of forgiveness sensor that she will pick up on. Because it is better for me. I hold on to things for a long time because I spend too much time thinking about how others feel. I don't really understand impulsive people as so many of my actions have come after careful deliberation. As this happened during Easter I thought W.W.J.D and for course the simple answer is forgive. He has already forgiven her, why am I still judging her for something she did as an adolescent I am sure it was hard on her too and that is why she couldn't face me. If she had been shameless we would still be friends until I found out what happened.
Forgiveness the gift that keeps on giving:)

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